There’s no reason to stay in a relationship when the love has waned. The decision to stay becomes a matter of obligation and obligation can easily manifest into resentment.
I remember the moment when my obligation to him became resentment. I blamed him for my unhappiness, yet my attempts to regain my happiness failed. I’d leave, but obligation had me coming back to the same old drama.
It took a couple attempts but I finally freed myself.
We’ve been doing this for what feels like forever.
Love had us so bright-eyed in the beginning. So in love it was sickening. Couldn’t be away from one another too long before we missed each other. Technology kept us together even when we were apart.
That bright-eyed stage passed. We still loved each other, but sometimes we would get on each other’s last nth of a nerve. I remember our first big fight. It was so bad that I wanted to leave. Your hugs and kisses reminded me why I was so in love with you.
We’re just two ordinary people in love.
My first serious relationship. We were SO into each other. Perhaps it was young (dumb) love, but I really felt like we could be forever. One day, he made me this mixtape CD. While there were a lot of songs that musically spoke for him, one song in particular stood out.
When I first heard this song, I was stunned. I knew he cared about me, but I had no idea his feelings were so strong. Actually, I don’t think either of us knew this relationship was going to get this deep. You date someone, knowing that it probably won’t last, then find yourself in love.
Don’t worry about the end.
Imagine being friends with someone for years. The two of you are extremely close. Those around you swear that there’s more to the friendship because you both are so in tune with one another.
The lines become blurred. You don’t see each other the same way anymore. Can’t really pinpoint when and why this is happening but you know something is pulling you both in.
It is in this moment that you realize that you’ve fallen in love.
So many thoughts.
What if he/she doesn’t feel the same way? But what if he/she feels the same? Where do we go from here? Can we go back to being just friends? Is it worth possibly losing a friend if this doesn’t work out?
Despite the uncertainty, your conscious wants you to do one thing: Surrender.
When I decided to do a writing challenge for February, I didn’t want to do the expected. February is synonymous with love. Like other retail holidays, stores are abundant with the red and pink packaging of goods. The card aisle is abundant with “I love you” decorated in glittery hearts.
I know I’m not in the minority when I say that all of this is sickening.
Love isn’t all happiness and good times. Yes, that’s great but it’s so much more. It’s dark. It’s painfully regretful. It’s an open wound. This is what I wanted to focus on. The beautifully dark aspect of love. Once I decided on that, I felt the need to deliver the message in a unique way.
This is where music comes into play.
For the month of February, all posts (with the exception of Wisdom Wednesdays), will consist of memories from my romantic life and a corresponding love song.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Love: A Musical Retrospective. Enjoy!
It was Sunday around 1:25 am EST. My friends and I were at our favorite club acting up as usual. We caught up while we sipped cocktails. Just a typical gathering until the DJ started playing some of our favorite songs. Little did I know that this typical night would soon become legendary.
My best friend was feeling the moment and decided to take the stage as her alter ego.
My friends and I were at our favorite club acting up as usual. The DJ started playing some classics and things got crazy.
My best friend’s decided to take the stage as her alter ego. Not only did her alter ego show up, but she SHOWED OUT!!! Homegirl was a dancing machine. She was definitely feeling herself.
I got inspired watching her.
It was a rough week. Being around my friends with the bass vibrating through our bodies felt amazing. We yelled, we screamed, we celebrated.
For a couple of hours, we left it on the dance floor and it felt great!
To avoid saying something I’ll regret later, I keep mum.
A barbacoa burrito bowl always makes me smile.
4. Watch “Will and Grace”.
My favorite TV show of all time. The comedic timing of that show was brilliant!
5. Pour a Drink.
Honey Whiskey is always available in my home.
Spend some time scrolling through pins and forget all about your bad mood.
Putting my thoughts/feelings in my journal relieves so much tension. When I go back to read it, I can recognize the catalysts that sparked my bad mood.
8. Take a walk.
Fresh air to clear the mind and get some exercise.
Put on some upbeat music and dance it out!
When all else fails, goodnight.
I find myself playing Tamia’s “Because of You” when I need comforting. That song brings it all back to perspective, especially when I find myself deep in doubt and in need of reassuring.
This song takes me to church every time I listen to it.
Ever have that one particular song that no matter how many times you hear it, you instantly start smiling?
I’ve been enthralled with Justin Timberlake’s “The 20/20 Experience” album (Part 1) since the day it was released. Of all the tracks, “That Girl” has frequently been on repeat.
This is an insta-happy song. You’ll catch yourself putting on a concert in your shower and/or car with absolutely no shame.
Check it out and let me know if you found yourself snapping your fingers and tapping your feet.
The moment you realize you’ve fallen in love, captured in song. I couldn’t have said it any better.